Too Long

Too long of a break. Old habits die hard.

I lost my main source of income this week and I feel lost. I’m a contractor, surely this must be old hat by now? But it’s been a tough year on the job front. Anyways — this blog doesn’t address this. That’s unfortunately reserved for other places (like my partner and friends… gotta stop doing that!)

More importantly, it doesn’t excuse the longer-than-planned break from the cut. It’s not a break if you don’t schedule your return. And I didn’t.

I just stopped.

And there I have it. What I can write (half-tipsy) in three minutes takes me six weeks in real time, lost time. So — let’s schedule my return, then. It takes me a while to post what I write, so (*spoiler alert*) it’s Nov 2 that I’m writing this. I have a holiday planned so it may take me longer to come back. No — no excuses. I will look at my cut tomorrow. There. I’ve said it.

November 3rd: Review cut of my skating video. I’m going to put it in my bullet journal.

There. I’ve done it.

Maybe it’s foolish to think that losing my income is not worth exploring in this blog — I have savings, but I live in London and it won’t last forever. I’m not in my twenties anymore and these ruts hit harder.

I had a different plan for this post. I was going to write about film festivals and getting excited for them.

But you can’t separate the non-creating artist from the human.